Want to know how you can tell if you are going to fail a drink driving, or sobriety, test? It's pretty simple. If you follow this guys lead then you can be fairly confident you wont score a pass.
How to fail a sobriety test
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Category Archives: Videos
Dog Judo
Did you know that the word Judo means "gentle way"? Well that's according to wikipedia, so it must be true. I'm not exactly convinced that Judo is the gentle way. The idea of buffed up dudes grappling each other to the ground and applying choke holds doesn't strike me as the most gentle of activities, particularly in comparison to knitting.
Judo is big, and I didn't know just how big it was until I saw that the animal kingdom is even into it. Canines, for example, seem to love it!
A Judo power date.
A Judo purist.
Kind of busy.
Apparently Judo can be anything, including guns.
Too busy for Judo? Bollocks!
He got mugged and lost his sausages.
Teenage Catgirls in Heat
Just when you think that you've seen everything (and no, I'm not talking about a man eating his own head), here is a movie trailer for the must see film of the millennium, Teenage Catgirls in Heat.
Everything about it screams quality.
Apparently the plot (perhaps plot is used loosely) involves an Egyptian cat goddess who transforms normal cats into Teenage Catgirls. Just so happens that the Catgirls are also in heat. What are the odds?
Fortunately, Amazon currently seem to stock the DVD. Get it while you can!
Hat tip to Mr Blankshooting for the ye olde heads up.
A tropical Skittles paradise
Woohoo biatches! A new Skittles commercial!
This one focuses on a happy place. A nice little tropical island paradise.
What does this ad prove? Well, if you ever find yourself at the end of a rainbow, poke your head through, and you'll no doubt see a relaxed looking dude, he can talk your ears off about Skittles all day.
Raise your hand if you want some Skittles now.
The Skittles Sheep
It is possible that I have an obsession with the Skittle commercials. I think that you are either the type of person that loves the Skittles ads or the type of person that hates them. Clearly I love them.
I posted the grown man raised by birds not all that long ago, so here's a companion ad, the Skittles Sheep Dudes.
As with all the other Skittles ads, this one is very random.
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124 ACTION 36 1998 PONTIAC ERNIE IRVAN SKITTLES WILD BERRY |  |
0 Bid | US $12.99 | 7h 38m |
Taste the rainbow!
Ever seen a grown man raised by birds?
The Skittles Leak Ad is one of my all time favorite ads. If you want to check out some of the other Skittles ads I highly recommend them.
The Skittles ad below is just as bizarre as any of the other ones I've seen. Bizarre yet strangely compelling.
Ever seen a grown man raised by birds?
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124 ACTION 36 1998 PONTIAC ERNIE IRVAN SKITTLES WILD BERRY | |
0 Bid | US $12.99 | 7h 38m |
The Best of Bogan
If you're in the market for some bogan jokes, then here are a few that may inspire you.
Q. What do you call a 30 year old bogan girl?
A. Grandma.
Q. Why did the bogan girl cross the road?
A. To start a fight with a complete stranger for no reason whatsoever.
Q. What do you call a bogan girl in a white tracksuit?
A. The bride.
Q. What's the first question during a bogan quiz night?
A. What you looking at?
Q. Two bogan kids in a car without any music - who is driving?
A. The policeman.
Q. What's the difference between a bogan boy and a bogan girl?
A. A bogan girl has a higher sperm count.
Q. What does a bogan girl use as protection during sex?
A. A bus shelter.
Q. How do you know if you're a bogan?
A. You let your 15 year old daughter smoke at the dinner table... in front of her kids.
Q. If you are driving and you see a bogan on a bike, why should you try not to hit him?
A. It might be your bike.
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A bogan walked into the centerlink office, marched straight up to the counter and said, 'Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job.'
The worker behind the counter said, 'Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful 30 year old daughter.
You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, and he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips and you will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The salary is $200,000 a year.'
The guy, wide-eyed, said, 'You're bullsh!ttin' me!'
The Centerlink worker said, 'Yeah, well . . . you started it.'
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Monkey Lord of the Dance
Ahhhh dancing monkeys. Is there anything better?
Apparently Michael Flatley trained these monkeys for three years, teaching them all the moves, receiving nothing but bananas for a reward. The monkey's themselves were paid $50 a day.
If you want to check out some other stupid monkey stuff, go have a gander at this monkey pulling a tigers tail... stupid stupid monkey...
Let's dance!
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SWAROVSKI ZODIAC MONKEY 7693 000 004 289 901 | |
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US $58.50 | 17m |
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5pcs Cute monkey Jingle Bells Beads Charms Pet Pendants Christmas Ornaments | |
0 Bid | US $.99 | 17m |
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Gymboree Boys Sweatshirt Size 2T 3T Monkey King of the Jungle line | |
2 Bids | US $6.50 | 18m |
Young Gordon Ramsey
Ever wondered what Gordon Ramsey was f*@#$! like when he was a f*@#$! little kid? I have to say, I've watched Ramsey's f*@#$! Kitchen and found myself wondering what he was f*@#$! like at primary f*@#$! school. I guess it's one of life's little f*@#$! mysteries.
This clip is basically what I'd have imagined Gordon f*@#$! Ramsey to be like as a kid. Enjoy.
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Gordon Ramseys Kitchen Nightmares UK Complete Series 2 | |
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US $22.05 | 22d 11h 17m |
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Royal Doulton Gordon Ramsey LARGE TURKEY Platter NEW | |
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US $79.99 | 29d 13h 9m |
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Royal Doulton Gordon Ramsey China Round Veggie Bowl NEW | |
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US $49.99 | 29d 13h 9m |
Monkey catches a tiger by the tail
Here's some further proof that monkeys are not that far separated from humans.
On the scale of stupid things to do, taunting a tiger, or grabbing a tiger by its tail would have to be towards the 'really quite stupid' end.
Based on this clip both monkey and man have the propensity for extreme stupidity and therefore, my non-scientific judgment suggests that man and monkey are not all that dissimilar.
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Godiego – Great Best Vol 2 CD – Monkey Magic Obi ゴダイゴSandy Pigsy Tripitaka | |
0 Bid | US $21.54 | 2h 21m |
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MTG Magic the Gathering Zodiac Monkey Japanese Portal 3K Green M NM | |
0 Bid | US $.99 | 10h 32m |
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MAGIC TOY MONKEY Amazing Monkey Plays Cymbal Hops Chirps Great Fun | |
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US $9.75 | 20h 45m |
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Nissan 240sx JDM Dmax Roof Spoiler S13 Hatch 180sx FastBack Wing Ka24de SOHCDOHC | |
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US $140.00 | 10d 2h 23m |
If you want more monkey check out Kung Fu Monkey Magic